Tuesday Thoughts

Today has sucked. I’m talking Major suckage. I’ve spent most of today in bed crying. My eyes are swollen and I’ve given myself a heck of a headache. I can’t decide if I’m crying because of chronic pain or because maybe I’m depressed? Both? Or maybe it’s hormones. The big 5-0 is much closer than the big 4-0. I guess you could say that I’m definitely walking uphill! (I’m not over the hill yet though!). I’ve always read that when you just can’t get yourself out of a funk, you should count your blessings. I would really rather punch someone, but since I’ve never punched anyone in my life, I’d better list my blessings. Here’s the thing- thinking of all the good things I have to be thankful for makes me realize that I have so many that I can’t even count them all! So why am I sitting in bed crying? And how come, in the movies, the woman crying in her bed looks great?? I just looked in the mirror. My eyes are so swollen and red that they look like those cinnamon jaw breakers. And my nose is red and snotty. My hair has that icky flat, knotty, thin look that comes from laying against a pillow too long. Now I want to punch the women in the movies who cry so pretty. Because I sure cry ugly. To top it all off, I can’t breathe through my nose. So I’m red, puffy, snotty and mouth breathing. Did I tell you that today sucks? I’m going to go count my blessings while I hunt for the box of tissue that fell between my headboard and the wall. I’ll come back a whole new me. I hope. Or at least come back with a better attitude.

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